Hollywood Humour

• In Hollywood, if you don’t have happiness you send out for it. - Rex Reeve
• To survive there, you need the ambition of a Latin-American revolutionary, the ego of a grand opera tenor, and the physical stamina of a cow pony. - Billie Burke
• The only reason I’m in Hollywood is that I don’t have the moral courage to refuse the money. - Marlon Brando
• In Hollywood gratitude is Public Enemy Number One. - Hedda Hopper
• The execs don’t care what color you are. They care about how much money you make. Hollywood is not really black or white. It’s green. - Will Smith
• It’s a scientific fact. For every year a person lives in Hollywood, they lose two points of their IQ. - Truman Capote
• I thought ‘Deep Throat’ was a movie about a giraffe. - Bob Hope
• Hollywood’s a place where they’ll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss, and fifty cents for your soul. I know, because I turned down the first offer often enough and held out for the fifty cents. - Marilyn Monroe
• The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly and lie about your age. - Lucille Ball
• I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally. - W.C. Fields
• Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times. - Mark Twain
• Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find some woman I really don’t like and just give her a house. - Rod Stewart
• There’s very little advice in men’s magazines, because men think, I know what I’m doing. Just show me somebody naked. - Jerry Seinfeld